The Shades of Fate
by PsychoShadowCat
Summary: "Is it fate, or chance? I can never decide..." Though Fate is a cruel mistress, ever fickle, ever heartless...your hardships might lead you to exactly where you want to be; where you're needed the most.
1. Prologue

Prologue

"…I hope that story satisfied you, Seeker."

The beardless dwarf sat back in his chair comfortably, his hands folded in his lap as he stared back at the heavily-armored woman, practically glowering at him from her standing position, barely three feet away from the storyteller.

"…That wasn't the WHOLE story, dwarf, and you know it."

Cassandra clearly knew more than she was letting on. Still, her 'prisoner' raised his eyebrows, giving her a rather convincing look of confusion.

"Whatever are you going on about, Seeker? You wanted the story of the Champion, you got exactly what you asked for."

"…I have reliable sources, Varric. You left out one very important character…protecting her is useless. Living witnesses saw the beast, dwarf…the beast that tipped the scales in your favor the day the Chantry was destroyed."

"…I have promises to keep, Seeker. Surely you wouldn't want to bring such a 'beast' down upon your head if I told you the story…"

"Try me, dwarf. You're not leaving this room until you give me the ENTIRE story, like you promised. No edits."

"…Well…it's your funeral, Seeker. We have to go back rather far in this story…back to when we were planning the expedition into the Deep Roads."


	2. Fated Paths

Chapter 1: Fated Paths

"…Let's see…did I get everything? Elfroot…check. Deep mushrooms…check. Deathroot…I think I managed to get a sufficient amount…That should be everything on the list. Oh, I forgot the spindleweed! Damn it…I'll have to go back and get it."

I shook my head, dusting the dirt from my hands right onto my black skirt. What was a little more dirt? I spent so much time at the Wounded Coast and up at the Vimmark Mountains doing herb collecting, I was usually covered in ample amounts of either dirt or sand. It just meant I'd need to spend some extra time scrubbing clean when I managed to find a good spot to bathe.

"All right, then. Spindleweed is usually close to the beach…"

With a sharp nod to myself, I grabbed my herb basket and turned my attention towards the coast. It was a beautiful day out on the Wounded Coast, and I took a deep breath of the fresh sea air. I'd have to go closer to the oceanside to find the spindleweed that I needed. Somehow, I had to put food in my belly, and selling herbs to the merchants in Kirkwall had sufficed for now. Usually, that was because my extensive knowledge could get them the herbs that their suppliers couldn't get, especially in the more dangerous areas. Of course, I was earning less coin then their human or dwarven comrades despite this fact, but I just had to deal with it.

It wasn't long before I found what I was looking for. The dark orange leaves of the spindleweed plant were vibrant compared to the sea of sand and patches of lush green, so spotting it and carefully gathering it up wasn't much of a chore. That was the last of the herbs I was looking for today, so I was just about ready to head back to Kirkwall. I wanted to be back in the city before it got dark, anyway. Usually the scoundrels came out at night, and avoiding trouble was key to survival in the City of Chains. At least it would be a nice walk back. The weather was pleasant, and I was happy to stick my bare feet in the water, if only for a little while.

The ocean was so blue today, I could see my reflection staring back at me once I took a few steps into the rising tide. Now was a good time to wash my face and hands clean of dirt, so I set about taking care of that. First, I had to pull my very long ebony hair back into a quick ponytail. With the ends reaching to the small of my back, bending over meant that the violet-tipped strands would go straight into the sea water. If I had more pins, I would have pinned back the violet side-bangs on the right side of my face, too. It was rather annoying that they would get into my face all the time, but I had to make due.

Small, thin hands reached forward, passing through the reflected image so I could scrub them clean. A young woman stared back at me while I worked, elvish by appearance, though the ears were noticeably smaller than your typical set of 'knife ears'. My face was too youthful. I'd always resented how young I looked, even as time passed me by. That was likely why at some point I'd gotten several piercings. They were supposed to make me look older, but they hadn't made a lick of difference. There was one silver ring on the left side of my lower lip, three tight silver rings hugging the lobe of each ear, and a long thin silver cuff earring hooked around the outer lining of my left ear.

A pair of violet eyes in the reflection closed as I brought my hands up to splash water onto my face. The charcoal coloring on my eyelids was going to run now, but I'd fix it later. (The coloring was supposed to make me look older, too. Didn't work.) I could see the smudge of black sliding down one of the two parallel scars over my right eye, and I stubbornly rubbed the smudge away. The day they create waterproof coloring, I'll praise the Maker.

I took a second to adjust my clothes, making sure the knee-high black skirt and thin white petticoat were set properly, my white half-sleeve blouse was in proper order and not flashing any inappropriate skin with the heart-shaped neckline, and the brown vest was secured tightly at the neck. The rustic key was still fashioned to the cord around my neck and rested against my chest, and that made me smile. Fond memories. Better days, indeed.

The reminiscing was short-lived. A bunch of loud voices were travelling along the beach, and my sensitive ears picked them up. Well…there went my peaceful walk home. I hurriedly grabbed an old dirty rag from inside of my herb basket to dry my face and hands off. Hopefully, it wasn't a bunch of troublemakers. That was just not a mess I wanted to deal with right now. I sighed, scooping up my basket and moving to step back out of the water and onto the warm sand. It was nice while it lasted, but it was time to head back to Kirkwall and try to get a decent reward for my hard work.

"…We need HOW much elfroot? By the Maker, that's enough for…"

"Twenty elfroot potions. We need enough for everyone, plus extra, in case we run into darkspawn."

…Now that peaked my curiosity. Darkspawn? But the Blight was over. The darkspawn had either been slain, or they went crawling back into the Deep Roads. I was starting to see the silhouettes ahead of the people talking. Let's see…one, two, three…oh, there's a fourth one. Must be a dwarf, he was rather short and hard to see from a distance. As our paths got closer and closer together, it was becoming easier to distinguish genders and features.

The group appeared to consist of two humans, one gentle man with long blonde hair in robes and one rather serious woman with very short black hair and red warpaint across her nose dressed in cheap leather. The small person was indeed a finely-dressed male dwarf with hair the color of copper all dressed in red. Odd-looking dwarf…where was his beard? He also seemed a lot more cheerful than most dwarves, most I've seen were rather grumpy. Their final member was a very odd-looking armored elf man lingering in the back, brooding silently. He had very lovely silver hair, and the beautiful strands caught my eye. It should have been those intricate pale white markings on his skin that swiped my attention first, but no. The short locks were more interesting. You didn't see many elves with such a hair color. Then again, the pot was calling the kettle black, all things considered. Mine is purple for Andraste's sake.

Only the elf man seemed to catch me staring at them as we started to pass by each other, the other three distracted with their argument about their plan of action. I had to resist the urge to giggle with their minor bickering. It was kind of amusing.

"The most elfroot should grow up farther in the grassy areas…right? Why didn't we just go to Sundermount?" The dwarf was clueless. Elfroot could be found up at Sundermount, true, but the Wounded Coast had a more plentiful and healthier supply.

"I see the plant here more often when we're out and about. It shouldn't be too hard to find…" At least the woman was talking some sense. Still, if she needed that much elfroot, it was going to take her hours if she wasn't familiar with the terrain out here.

"…We should have just bought the potions…"

"With what coin, Blondie? Lady Elegant charges a good bit of coin for hers. That's why we're collecting the herbs for Bartrand's alchemist in the first place. It's more work, but it's much cheaper."

Sighing, I turned on my heel and approached the group. These poor people were absolutely lost, and my conscience wouldn't let them waste away hours trying to find what they were looking for. From the sound of it, they were in desperate need of the supplies for whatever they were up to. They were…an odd bunch, but they seemed nice enough. What could happen?

"…Excuse me. I…apologize for eavesdropping. Though, you were talking rather loudly…ah, not the point. Do you need some help finding that elfroot? I come out here all the time gathering herbs, I can show you a good place or two to find the quantity that you need. Sounds like it's for something very important."

All of them now had their gazes trained on me, giving me rather funny looks, varying from person to person. Most of them were confused, the elf kind of just looked…annoyed. I suppose I do look rather strange, but I know better than anyone that appearances are deceiving. I did my best to give them a reassuring smile and even held up my herb basket to corroborate my story. I did have elfroot in the basket, but not in the large quantity that they required for whatever it is that they were doing. I could have shared, but I simply didn't have enough to help them AND fill my orders all at once.

"…Are you sure you have the time to help us? We could use the assistance, but I wouldn't want to impose…and we don't have any coin to pay you with." The woman spoke up first. Her voice was kind, but I could tell that she was scrutinizing me very carefully, almost as if she was assessing if I was a threat or not. I was used to that look by now and I shrugged it off.

"Ha! No charge. I'm just glad that my knowledge can be helpful to people that really need it. It sounds like whatever you're doing, it's important. I'll be happy to show you one of my favorite spots!"

"That's really nice of you, kiddo. We'll try to get out of your hair as fast as we can." The dwarf smiled at me nicely and even gave me a wink. "Lead on then, master herbalist!"

"Master herbalist? Oh, I wouldn't go THAT far." I waved off his compliment as I turned on my heel and started further inland. "There's a rather large patch of elfroot in this direction, though it's a bit of a distance. It's better than running all over the Coast getting the amount you need from multiple plants, though, when you can get your supplies all in one go. Saves time in the long run." My bare feet pressed into the soft sand, following the path that I knew by heart. "What do you need that many potions for, anyway? Going on a dangerous quest to slay some beasts? Delivering supplies to the refugees perhaps?"

"Nothing so honorable, I'm afraid. We're going on an expedition into the Deep Roads looking for anything of value." That time, it was the blonde human that spoke up, and I nodded towards him. Well, that made loads more sense, since they had been talking about darkspawn.

"Ah, I see. So, treasure hunters. The Deep Roads are pretty dangerous, even if the Blight is over. Now I see the need for so many potions. Well, I hope your expedition goes well and without incident."

"What about YOU, then?" The male elf finally spoke for the first time in my presence, his eyes narrowed at me. Ah, suspicion. I've gotten that look many times, too. "What are you doing in the Wounded Coast, by yourself, no less? It's no secret that bandits travel through here because it's the most direct route to Kirkwall."

"Just trying to make a living, like the rest of the city-dwelling elves. As I said before, I was picking herbs. The basket isn't just for show, after all. I sell them to the merchants in Lowtown all the time. I'm also aware that it's dangerous out here, but I'm very careful, and I don't stay any longer than I have to. It's easier to avoid any bandit groups when you're by yourself, making very little noise and moving quickly. Besides, if I was up to no good, I wouldn't have chanced a conversation when I'm clearly outnumbered and unarmed. Does that satisfy your curiosity, ser?"

That seemed to satisfy his accusations, at least for now, and the group lapsed into silence for a little while. Eventually, though, the woman spoke up again, chuckling a bit to herself.

"You know, we imposed upon you for your help, and we didn't even introduce ourselves or have the decency to ask your name. How rude of us."

"That's all right, I forget common courtesy rather frequently myself. I'm always too busy to stop and take a second to talk. I'm Naela, and you and your friends would be…?"

"Marian Hawke."

"Varric Tethras, at your service, madam." There was that charismatic grin again from the dwarf. He seemed to have a way with talking to people. I liked him almost instantaneously. Maybe it was that cheery attitude, it was infectious.

"Just Anders, if you don't mind. Nice to meet you, miss. The dark and brooding one behind us is Fenris. Don't mind him, he's always like this."

"…I do not brood."

"Friend, if your brooding were any more impressive, women would swoon as you passed. They'd have broody babies in your honor."

I had to resist the urge to chuckle at Varric's words as I kept moving, focused on our destination now that the chit-chat had died down. Once we got closer to the location I beckoned them to follow quickly behind me, ducking under a tree branch and turning a corner around a very large set of boulders to reveal to the group a cluster of elfroot plants, hiding away in this small corner of the Coast. I'd found this little treasure trove at least three or four moons back, and I only used it when large quantities of elfroot were requested to me by the merchants. I didn't mind sharing my little secret spot with them for such an important mission.

"Well! That should be plenty of elfroot for the alchemist." Anders was already approaching the bushes and moving to collect the plant's medicinal components, with Hawke coming to his aid and Fenris keeping a lookout. "We shouldn't have to worry about a lack of supplies now! Still, we'll only take what we need."

"This was a very big help, Angel. Thanks!"

"…Uh…Angel…?"

"You came to our rescue like you were sent by the Maker himself!"

"…Varric has a habit of giving people nicknames…mostly the people he likes." Hawke shook her head as she stood, dusting her hands off on her pants while Anders finished up gathering the bright green herbs. "…Don't pay it any mind. In any case, he's right, this saved us a lot of time, and we appreciate it."

"It was my pleasure. It's starting to get a bit late, though, so if there's no more pressing business we need to attend to, how about all of us head back to Kirkwall together? Strength in numbers, I suppose. We don't want to be caught out here after dark."

"An excellent suggestion. We could at least walk you home since you went out of your way for us. Right, Hawke?"

"I don't see why we can't, Anders. Where do you live?"

"Oh…uh, the Alienage, with the rest of the city elves."

"We can always stop in and go see Daisy while we're in the area, see how she's settling in. It's been a while since we checked in with her."

"…I would rather avoid speaking to the blood mage…"

"Come on, Fenris, she's a sweet girl…"

I let their little bit of bickering fade into the background while I mused over today's' events. It was a bit overwhelming, the kindness of these strangers…but I wasn't going to turn down the offer. That would have been rude of me. Though…it was going to be a bit of a predicament if they discovered my little white lie. Really…I lived in Darktown, not the Alienage. If they were to witness my living conditions, well…it might raise a few eyebrows, and I didn't want the questions, let alone the pity. The party looked like they were preparing to leave, so I scurried across the sand to catch up with them, my makeshift ponytail whipping around behind me.

The walk was uneventful, for a time. were over halfway to the city, and by now the sky had darkened considerably. My eyes and ears weren't bothered by the dark, so I kept alert as we walked. The others were easily chatting away, the only exception besides myself being Fenris. He seemed like a very serious type…or the paranoid type with how 'on alert' he was. Was he so used to looking over his shoulder? How strange… and sad. What kind of hardships had he endured…?

"Do you think Merrill will mind us coming over at this hour…? It may be too late to see her…and I need to check in with Mother, see how she's doing at home. Hopefully Uncle Gamlen isn't driving her mad…"

"I'm sure Merrill will be glad to have our company, even if it is brief. Still, I have to agree with you, we can't stay long. I have to make sure I don't have any patients waiting for me back at the clinic…"

I sensed the danger at about the same time Fenris spoke up. His senses must have been on par with mine somehow. How strange.

"…We're not alone."

You could practically feel the tension in the air as everyone in the group was suddenly on high alert once Fenris's deep tone reverberated quietly between all of us. We continued walking, but hands were already reaching for weapon hilts, conversations had ceased, and all of the attention had been brought to our surroundings. Everybody present was prepared for a fight with weapons and armor. Me? Well…I had an herb basket. I was vulnerable. This…was not going to end well, I could feel it in my bones.

You could hear it…footsteps. The crunching of leaves. There had to be enemies hiding in the patches of shrubs or in the treeline around us. Why were they here…? What were they waiting for…? If they were planning an ambush, they had already given themselves away and failed miserably. I couldn't quite put my finger on it…but apparently, I could put my foot on it. My left foot collided with a metal surface instead of sand.

 _ **SNAP!**_

By the Maker! I cried out and dropped my herb basket as metal teeth sank into the flesh of my foreleg. A bear trap?! It had been hidden in the sand so well, I didn't even notice it! Apparently, that was what our attackers had been waiting for, as several rugged-looking men came from a large cluster of shrubs, and a few more scattered men came out from behind trees and boulders, weapons at the ready. I had just inadvertently stumbled into their trap, and now things were about to take a turn for the worse.

"Well, well, well! Look what we have here, boys! You folks look like you've gotten yourselves into a bit of trouble! Maybe we could lend a hand…"

Damn it! My foot was caught fast. I could have leaned down and attempted to free myself from the bear trap, but there were bows trained on us. One false move and there was a good likelihood that I was going to get shot. This wasn't good… we were outnumbered and they were slowly attempting to surround us.

The others were already drawing weapons. Fenris had himself a massive greatsword, Hawke was sporting a pair of nice daggers, Varric had a heavy crossbow, and Anders had a staff. This was going to turn into an all-brawl **very** quickly, and there wasn't anything I could do but watch as the four took up defensive positions around me.

 _Shit…what am I supposed to do…?_

"Hmmm…the little one's damaged goods, but I bet we can still get a good price for her. She's got a cute face. Might be able to get something for the other knife ear, too…funny-looking fella. Not sure about the rest of them…well, we can clap 'em in irons and see what we get, anyway."

 _Slavers. It had to be slavers…the worst kind of criminal in Kirkwall._

Their 'conversation' seemed to only piss off Fenris more, his grip tightening on his greatsword while his markings shimmered slightly. Wait a minute, what? Normal tattoos weren't supposed to do that…

… _Is that a trick of the light…? What kind of markings are those…?_

My attention went back to Fenris himself. That fury on his face…it was like watching a mabari on a leash, snapping and snarling with unsatisfied hunger, but unable to reach his prey. He was powerless, anxious…at least until he was let off of the leash to satiate his desires.

He exchanged looks with Hawke, and the woman nodded, giving him a slight smirk. What was she grinning about at a time like this!? It had to be something **very** amusing if it had her smiling when we were outnumbered. This must have been some sort of inside joke between friends that went right over my head. How frustrating.

"…Have at it, Fenris. No mercy."

"…With pleasure…"

And with that, Fenris was on the move, charging right into the middle of the group rather recklessly. He was going to get seriously hurt doing that, right?! To my surprise, arrows flew, but…they went right through him? Oh…his markings were glowing an eerie shade of ethereal blue. Was it some form of magic? I was unfamiliar with any sort of magic that could make you intangible, though…by the Maker, how was this even possible?!

"…Varric, cover him. Anders, stay here with her."

In a flash, Hawke was joining Fenris in the fray, tossing a glass flask into the air and then kicking it to the ground by the archers. The glass shattered, releasing a cloud of billowing smoke that distracted the ranged fighters. Hawke barely gave them a second to breathe before she dove right into the fray. She was like a flurry of blades, slipping in and out of the manmade fog. You could already hear screams as the two blademasters felled opponent after opponent, staining the sand with crimson blood. Varric was pitching in, crossbow bolts raining down on the melee attackers, crippling them for Fenris to pick off easier…as if he wasn't cutting through them like a knife through butter already.

A few stray men came our way with swords brandished, but Anders waved his hand and an ice wall separated us from them, buying us a bit of time.

"Think you can get yourself out of that trap?"

"Yeah, I got it!"

The mage kept his attention on our surroundings while I bent over, inspecting the bear trap. It was a simple trap, so it was easy to grab the jaws firmly with my hands. Then I pushed down to separate them. Once I had just enough wiggle room, I pulled my foot out and released the trap, letting it snap shut again. My open wound stung, but that was the last thing on my mind as I straightened up and glanced around at the battlefield once more, taking stock of what was going on.

Anders's ice wall wasn't meant to stay up indefinitely, as it was starting to crack, crumble, and melt. Already, the melee attackers were resuming their charge, and Anders was making it rain ice shards down on their heads to slow them down while he stepped between me and the enemy. Some of the ice shards impaled a few of them, but the remaining warriors were still rushing ahead, coming for us. Anders prepared himself for melee combat, holding his staff defensively.

"Stay behind me!"

"No problem!"

The problem with mages was that they couldn't do much when the enemy was upon them. The remaining slavers rushed Anders, two of them clashing weapons with him while a third was looking for an opening to get at me. There was no way he could take them all on by himself… I was just being a liability on the battlefield and putting him at risk needlessly.

 _What do I do…? Should I…? But… I can't! I can't do it!_

Too late. Just as Anders knocked one of his opponents upside the head, the other one pushed back, the two clashing weapons fiercely while the third one slipped past his defenses and grabbed my arm, pulling me towards him.

… _I am_ _ **not**_ _going to let this happen…no way in hell!_

With my free hand, I took a good swing at him as he pulled me in. I managed a good punch to the bastard in the throat with the coming momentum and knocked the wind out of him. Hah! Armor always had fatal flaws if you knew how to exploit them. Stunned, he immediately let go of me and I took off running across the sand, taking advantage of the situation. Sadly, my success was short-lived, and he took off into a sprint in my direction mere moments later. He was right behind me, reaching for me…but he was interrupted.

I turned abruptly when I heard the battle cry, followed by an agonizing scream and the spray of blood on the back of my clothes. There was Fenris with his greatsword in hand, blood spraying everywhere from my pursuer and his now severed arm on the sand, as well as the stump that was left over from the brutal attack. The others must have decimated the front line and joined us, from the looks of it. Anders and Hawke were finishing off the last man together while Varric was busy shooting a survivor point blank in the head while he was laying on the ground.

Soon enough, the fresh amputee fell to the sand, screaming like a frightened goat while he bled out. I didn't bat an eyelash at him, instead turning my attention to Fenris. He was soaked in the blood of his enemies, but otherwise unharmed. Thank the Maker…! Everybody else joined us, and it seems they all fared just as well, though nobody was as much of a mess as Fenris was. None of us had gotten hurt in the skirmish, and I couldn't help but crack a little smile. Maybe a scratch here and there, but those were all superficial. Their fighting skill had to be amazing to walk away from a fight like this without any serious injury.

They all jogged over once their work was concluded, Varric giving my fresh wound a furrowed brow. I was hoping they weren't going to make much of a fuss about it, but my hopes were dashed almost immediately.

"You all right, Angel? That looks nasty…you really should have been wearing shoes out here."

Glancing down at my ankle, I sighed. It was swelling up a bit and the bleeding hadn't quite stopped yet. Great…what a nuisance. At least it was my left leg. I had my lucky anklet wrapped up and tied to the right ankle. It would have been a shame if that was destroyed.

"I'll be fine, I promise. It stings, nothing more. Everyone else okay?"

"Don't worry about us, we all just about walked away without a scratch. You're the one that nearly lost a foot!"

"Hawke's right, we need to take care of that injury before it gets infected with all of the sand and dirt you're covered in…" Anders was already moving to retrieve my little herb basket, picking up the scattered herbs and putting them back into the wicker container. "I'd take care of it now, but there could be more of those slavers about. It's too dangerous to linger here any longer. We'll skip the trip to Merrill's and go straight to my clinic in Darktown."

"Really, it's not necessary…!"

"I don't think Blondie's going to take no for an answer, Angel. It'd make us all feel better if you went. After all, if we hadn't kept you out later than you intended, you wouldn't have gotten wrapped up in that scuffle."

"…Evidently, I don't have much of a choice in the matter, do I…?"

With the way they were all looking at me, there was no room for argument. I sighed, but I nodded. I suppose it wouldn't hurt to at least get it looked at, right? If it would put them all at ease, I didn't mind the extra hassle. I doubt they would believe me anyway if I told them I'd be fine without the fuss.

Satisfied at my response, the group moved as one, heading back towards the city. This time, though, they moved in more of a formation, most likely for my sake. Hawke led the way while Anders was on my right and Varric was on my left, with Fenris bringing up the rear. It seemed like everybody was working to match my slower pace as well, thanks to the limp I had obtained from the injury. It was…nice…they were all thinking about me and trying to help. Me, a total stranger…

Maybe this world isn't so hopeless after all, if people like this still exist...

…..

I'd heard rumors of Darktown's clinic, but I had never actually been there before. Like the rest of the underground city, the place was in shambles, but Anders had done his best to keep it tidy and fill the place with clean cots for his patients. Currently, I was sitting on one of those cots, letting Anders do most of the mending with his magical abilities. Really, he had to be a well-practiced mage with how little time and effort it took. I was quite impressed.

The wound was clean and closed up now, all that was left was to give it a few hours to finish healing by itself with the boosted regeneration. He was still bandaging it, though, just to keep it free of grime and avoid any further complications. Darktown could only get so clean, after all!

"You really should have been wearing shoes, or the wound wouldn't have been so terrible. At least some leather boots would have given you some protection from the bear trap."

"I just feel more comfortable without shoes, really, so I never wear them. As you can imagine, this sort of thing doesn't happen to me very often…regardless, it's not a bother."

Anders just gave me a raised eyebrow at my response before he stood from his crouched position, shaking his head at me incredulously. Well, I didn't expect him to understand, so I shrugged right back at him. Everybody has their quirks, right?

"In any case, you should probably stay here, at least for tonight. You need to heal and rest that foot. Besides, it's very late now, and Darktown can be just as dangerous as the Coast. You're guaranteed to run into trouble if you leave at this hour."

…I had to agree. Reluctantly, I nodded in favor of his suggestion. Walking home now would just create more unnecessary problems that I didn't have the energy to deal with. I was quite tired after such an adventure, my clothes were ruined from the blood, and my deliveries in the morning were likely going to be late thanks to all of this mess. What a day it had been.

"I'll see if I have anything you can wear instead of those dirty clothes... Hawke, if you're heading out, let me walk you to the door, at least."

"Oh, that's really not necessary…"

"I won't have you sleeping in those filthy clothes. I insist."

Hawke had been sitting around, making idle conversation with Anders while he worked. She was the only one to stick around unsurprisingly, as Fenris made for Hightown as soon as we got through the city gates, and Varric went straight for The Hanged Man out in Lowtown looking for information on our attackers. Now, it looked like she had to depart to check on that family she mentioned.

"Guess that's my cue to head home as well. Get some rest, and good night, Naela. Perhaps I will see you some other time?"

"Uh…good night, Hawke...maybe…"

Hawke and Anders quickly retreated, and I was left alone to my thoughts. They were a nice bunch of people, that much was obvious, but it was a bit…overwhelming. Maybe stifling is a better word to describe such showers of kindness. This was Kirkwall, after all. Everyone that lived here was only looking out for themselves…but maybe they were the exception.

Meanwhile, Hawke and Anders were exchanging rather serious looks as he led the woman towards the front doors of the clinic. He seemed very puzzled about something, while she had her eyebrow quirked at him.

"…Don't you think something's a little…off about her? She's…very strange. I'm not sure what to make of her."

"She is a little weird…but I don't see anything wrong with that. She seems like a nice girl, after all. I wouldn't dwell about it too much. You'll get frown lines on that handsome face of yours."

"Hawke…! Not now…"

"Oh, all right, all right. I'll refrain from teasing you when you have a guest. Just…keep an eye on her. I don't think she's being entirely honest with us. Sure, she works with plants, but she's absolutely filthy, and she's not even wearing any shoes…maybe she's lacking in coin and just too proud to admit it."

"That's a good possibility. Poor thing…the elves are treated even worse than the Ferelden refugees around here. I'll talk to her in the morning, maybe there's something I can do to help her out…"


	3. Bonding Threads

Chapter 2: Bonding Threads

The next morning, Anders woke to a rather clean clinic, dusted and re-organized with his medical supplies in their proper places. He was only half-awake as he practically watched me dancing around the dimly lit room while I was sweeping. Hey, it was peaceful, and quiet. I couldn't help but have a little fun while I was working. I'd gotten up bright and early to leave, but noticing the state that the clinic was in, I decided to at least clean the place up before I left. I'd already washed the massive shirt he had given me to wear to bed and laid it out to dry. Why not just clean the whole clinic for him? Surely, he was too busy to do it himself, and it was the least I could do. I was hoping to get the work done and be gone before he woke, but there was just so much to do, I lost track of the time.

"…Oh! Morning, Anders!"

"…Did you…? All by yourself?"

"Well, I didn't want to wake you up just to say goodbye… and waiting around doing nothing was going to get boring quickly. Besides, you're not even dressed. You're still half asleep, aren't you?"

A half lie, but a necessary one. I smiled at him sheepishly and shrugged before I turned my attention back to my work. I wasn't leaving until this place was spotless! It would drive me absolutely crazy to work in such conditions. I preferred a tidy workspace, thank you very much. You'd never find anything you needed with a sloppy office.

He simply looked at me incredulously, shaking his head and returning to the back rooms, likely to go change his clothes. His 'morning self' was a lot different than his normal self, and that made me chuckle. Instead of those stiff robes and his tied back hair giving him a neat appearance, he looked a bit ragged with his baggy shirt and trousers he wore to bed as well as his tousled long hair. I suppose most people were like that in the morning, no matter how neat and tidy they usually were. I know I'm definitely a grouchy bear in the morning. I'm a night owl most of the time, though my work keeps me awake at normal hours.

By the time Anders returned, the floor was swept and mopped, leaving it slightly damp. I was busy chuckling at all of the footprints my bare feet had left in the thin layer of water when I heard his footsteps approaching. Now the mage was dressed, his hair combed, and he was trying to hand me half of a fresh bread loaf. The one in his other hand, he had already taken a few bites out of.

"Oh, that's not necessary…"

"Take it, you must be hungry after all of that cleaning, which you didn't have to do. Least I can do is feed you."

I sighed a bit in defeat. Once again, it did not seem like I had much of a choice in the matter. I wiped my dirty hands on my vest, not that it was going to help much, and took the bread with a nod of thanks.

"…If this 'back-and-forth' favor thing keeps up, we're just going to keep doing nice things for each other, aren't we?"

"I don't suppose that's such a bad thing!"

Both of us burst into fits of chuckling. Anders wasn't such a bad human, really, and his lighthearted attitude was more than welcome. He gestured towards one of the cots, and we sat down together to eat our shared breakfast and inspect my finished handiwork. All in all, I didn't do too bad, but I'd only gotten myself even dirtier. I hadn't had a single chance to bathe or wash my clothes since the fiasco yesterday evening. Putting back on my dirty clothes hadn't helped matters, either. The first order of business when I left the clinic was to take a bath…and I still had to deliver the herbs to the market!

…Damn it. They were going to be so late…! I was already hopping to my feet at the realization, stuffing the bread loaf into my mouth and holding it in place with my teeth while I gathered up the basket, making sure everything was in there before I stood up.

"…Well, you're suddenly in a hurry…forget something?"

I nodded, gesturing with my head towards the basket. I was going to have to eat on the road, I was already late by at least an hour, maybe even two!

"…I see. I was hoping we'd have more time to sit and talk. You should come back sometime. Be careful out there…and maybe get some shoes for those feet of yours…?"

I rolled my eyes at him, pausing halfway to the door to take the bread out of my mouth so I could retort right back to the smart mage. Hah! He clearly knew nothing of elves.

"Only the 'domesticated' city elves wear shoes, Anders! Everybody knows that! Fenris only wears those foot wraps, right?"

Anders didn't have much time to say anything else, as I was already bolting for the door, waving at him with my free hand. I'd have to come back to the clinic and formally apologize for leaving so quickly. I felt bad for being rude, but these deliveries HAD to be made, or I wasn't going to get paid!

"…She's right, he does…come to think of it, so does Merrill…why didn't I notice that before…?"

…..

After a quick bath, a change out of those bloody clothes and the late deliveries finished up, I found myself wandering the Lowtown market. I did need fresh food supplies, after all. While I'm at it, it's probably a good idea for me to find more fabric to get started on sewing some new clothes after I had an entire outfit destroyed by Fenris and a dead man's blood. Sewing was something I picked up at a young age, and for good reason. Digging around in large herb gardens usually left you with filthy and ripped clothing. It also helped when clothes were too damn expensive to buy, so you only had two outfits.

Yesterday had been…something. I couldn't help but let out a heavy sigh while I was browsing over the fresh fruit stand. Death wasn't something that bothered me anymore, not one bit. That level of brutality, though, that came from sheer hate. Clearly, Hawke's friend had a serious problem with slavers. She had interesting friends, but he stuck out to me the most. Don't get me wrong, those bastards deserve whatever is coming to them. I just…I don't know. He kind of reminds me of myself. The rage he had built up…and his strange power had definitely caught my attention. What form of magic WAS that? I'm no expert, but I've seen my fair share of strange things. This…was something new to me, and it had me absolutely fascinated. The power to phase through solid objects? You know a lot of mages would give an arm to do something like that.

I shook my head, refocusing on the task at hand. Thanks to the deliveries coming late, I had to take a heavy dock on the pay I usually got. I'd have to shop smart for food, and seeing the prices on fabric this month? I'd have to put off that replacement outfit until I could get some extra work. I grumbled in annoyance, setting an apple back down onto the cart at the fruit stand. What I wouldn't give for a nice big steak…! Sadly, it was just too risky for me to go out hunting. Too many eyes. I'd take my safety over my personal comfort, thank you very much. I'd just have to settle for what was cheap. Maybe I could make a hearty stew? A potato soup, maybe, with some other choice vegetables thrown in. Ugh… without meat, it would still be a poor excuse for a meal. It just wasn't right without some nice pork chunks…or cuts of bacon…

I was starting to lose my appetite and I was just about ready to give up on market shopping when I spotted a familiar shape out of the corner of my eye. It looked like Hawke was busy shopping too, this time with a young lady that appeared to look very similar to her. A younger Hawke with longer hair, dressed in robes? Perhaps a sister, then. That was the only explanation. They were laughing and carrying on as women do while they were browsing the stalls. I was just about to duck behind a pillar, but Hawke caught sight of me rather quickly and waved before she headed in my direction. The girl who I assumed was her sister followed along right behind her with an inquisitive look about her. God damn it, Hawke! I plastered a grin on my face as the two girls approached, nodding in a friendly manner.

"I didn't expect to see you roaming about the markets today with that injury. Feeling any better?"

"Oh! Hello, Hawke. Yes, I'm all healed, no need to worry. I was just shopping around for food for the week. What about you?"

"We are just checking the local wares, see if we can find anything else useful for our expedition. My sister Bethany will be staying home to watch over our mother while I'm gone, but she still insists on helping me with the supplies at the very least."

"I'm still not happy about it…"

Clearly, she wasn't happy whatsoever, with the look that she was giving Hawke. There was definitely a smidge of animosity there for being left behind. Poor Bethany!

"But do you REALLY want to leave Mother alone with Uncle Gamlen while we're away?"

"…Point taken…he is absolutely horrid...Mother can handle him, it's **his** safety I'm worried about at this point."

Sounds like Hawke had quite a bit of family problems, but that usually happens with large families…right? I slightly shrugged at them as I adjusted the empty wicker basket on my elbow, glancing between the two girls while things were cooling down. Well, I couldn't avoid having a normal conversation with them any longer, so might as well just go with it.

"…So, your expedition…when are you all leaving for the Deep Roads?"

"At the end of the week, bright and early in the morning. Preparations went a lot faster thanks to your help with the herbs, so we can get on with things sooner than we expected."

"Oh, so THIS is the elf you were telling me about last night! Naela, was it? I was just suggesting to Hawke this morning that I think she ought to invite you to go along with her and her group. The expedition has a good supply of herbs now, as well as an alchemist…but I don't think they have someone among them that knows a considerable amount about herbs. I'm sure you could identify a few plants for them along the way, right?"

"…And I was telling Bethany that I couldn't just ask you such a thing out of the blue…thank you, dear sister. I know it's a dangerous trip and you could be gone for weeks, if not months…but obviously everyone is getting paid well. I'm helping to fund the expedition as a partner, and I plan on sharing anything I make on the trip with the companions I bring along. Varric is Bartrand's brother, so he has to come along, and Anders knows the Deep Roads well. Fenris will be coming with us three for some added protection, as he's one of our best fighters, and Aveline will be busy with her new role as Guard Captain once all of the paperwork is done. Merrill is still moving into her place in the Alienage, so she needs time to settle down."

"…I still think Isabela would be a better idea instead of Fenris…"

"There's nothing wrong with Fenris, in fact he is the best candidate. Isabela is knowledgeable about rare treasures, that much is obvious, but she has her work cut out for her holding down the fort by watching Gamlen and making sure he's keeping his fingers clean. I know you don't trust him because he has issues with mages…but he's very reliable."

"…Hawke, he gives me the creeps."

While the two descended into their banter, my thoughts went to the offer. The Deep Roads? I'd never braved such a dangerous place. Not that I can't handle myself or anything, but staying out of trouble was my top priority. In Kirkwall, I'm struggling just to stay afloat with the sparse coin I make. This expedition, if we found something even remotely fascinating, could lead to enough coin to set me up for a year or two. It was something I had to seriously consider. There would be many able-bodied warriors, I'd be safe. Plus, I'd be doing a service to these people, making sure they stayed stocked on herbal supplies and avoided any dangerous plants.

"…I'll have to seriously think about it, Hawke. It's a tempting offer, I'm not going to lie. As you said though, it would be a very dangerous trip. Give me a day or two to think about it, all right?"

The two girls paused their conversation and turned me, like they had forgotten I was here in the first place. Their own conversation about their choice in travel companions ceased, and Hawke gave me a nod in agreement once they had recovered from the minor surprise.

"…Right, I can understand that. Bartrand has assured us the darkspawn population will be at it's lowest, and you'll be traveling close by with either us or the caravan when we have to scout ahead and clear the way for everyone else. We're taking every precaution, so the expedition will be the safest that it can possibly be. I'm really hoping you'll come with us. I can give you instructions to my house, you can leave a letter for me with your response if you don't see me around Kirkwall."

"That will work perfectly for me, thanks Hawke."

Already, Hawke was grabbing a scrap piece of paper from her pocket that had her address neatly written on it. Apparently, she was used to having people delivering her letters or having them come by her house. Then again, with someone doing dangerous expeditions like this, she likely needed to make as many useful contacts as she could. I took the paper from her with a nod, settling it in one of my skirt's pockets. I'd sleep on it before I fully decided if I was going to tag along on this expedition or not. It was a great risk for me personally to take…I just had to decide if the risk was worth the extra coin.

"…Well, we're just about done here, so we're going to let you get back to your shopping, Naela. I apologize for interrupting you while you're in the middle of hunting down groceries."

"It's no trouble at all, Hawke, really. You can use all the help you can get for that kind of expedition. I'll see you soon, I suppose?"

"I'm hoping so!"

"It was a pleasure meeting you, Naela. Come on, sister, Mother's waiting for us."

Bethany had to practically drag Hawke towards the residential district of Lowtown while I was returning my attention to the market stalls. Despite the protests of my appetite, I had to find **something** to eat for dinner tonight, even if I didn't feel up to it. Besides, a few stray children in Darktown were likely going to show up at my spot once they smelled the food cooking, and I'd hate to disappoint them. Maybe I'd go for the potato soup after all…at least it was easy to share, right?

…..

My shabby little grey tent was feeling a lot lonelier with the kids gone. The soup didn't last very long with so many orphaned children down here with empty bellies and no parents to feed them. I skipped supper myself, as I figured I would. My appetite was rather lacking, and there was a new child in the group that had just lost his father to a fishing boat's shipwreck. Poor boy. Me skipping out meant that there was more food to go around for the others.

I shook my head, busying myself with washing my single cooking pot. Of course, I was using clean water from Lowtown. I usually kept a waterskin on me when I went up there and filled it every chance I got. The water down here was either scarce, or water you really shouldn't have been drinking or washing with. Half the time that was why the refugees down here got sick, because of desperation. I was lucky enough to have basic cookware and a tent over my head. Some of the folks down here didn't even have that. I'd often find my foodstuffs or my cookware missing. Once, I even found the whole tent missing. I couldn't blame them, most of the folks down here couldn't find work and had to resort to stealing to care for themselves and their families. When it happened, I'd just buy new supplies without a fuss. I had work, and I could buy new things. They couldn't.

The day was starting to wind down…kind of. Who am I kidding? Not really. It was never quiet in Darktown. Too many thugs, bandits and slavers came down here to harass the beaten and broken when the sun went down. Too many times my sleep was disturbed by a commotion, a brawl, or even worse. The guard patrols barely swept through here once a day, if they were 'feeling up to it'. Crime was a normal occurrence here, because nobody cared about the refugees. It was everybody for themselves in Kirkwall. And tonight? Well, it was going to be no exception to the rule.

I was just about done cleaning things up and preparing my tent for the night when I spotted the oncoming trouble: a bunch of well-dressed Free Marchers had a scraggly-looking kid by the ear and they were practically dragging him along the rough pavement of Darktown. Sadly, the kid was familiar. It was the same orphan boy that had joined the usual group of kids that came to me for food on occasion. He'd only been at my tent eating about an hour ago! The poor boy was screaming and crying, these cruel men scratching up his skin while they laughed at his torment. I didn't know where they were going, but it was likely not a pleasant place for a child.

Damn my soft nature. I had to intervene. I stood, making my way over to the men, cutting them off from their path and barring their way with my arms crossed over my chest. Yes, I'm small and not very intimidating, but I can at least **attempt** to be a little physically threatening. Maybe it would work this time? Maybe?

Clearly, it wasn't working since they broke out into guffaws at the elf girl that was glowering at them. They weren't intimidated in the slightest. I should have known that was going to be their reaction. Oh well, so much for that plan. Once their laughter had died down, the one grabbing the boy's ear spoke up towards me.

"Move it, knife ear! You're in our way!"

"I don't plan on moving until you tell me why you're dragging a child around by his ear. He's clearly not even your child, so what gives you the right to discipline him like this? Hmmm? Picking on a child… I hope you big strong men are proud of yourselves for overpowering someone so much smaller than you."

"This little runt nicked my coin purse, he did! The boys and I were just about to teach him what happens to Ferelden brats with sticky fingers. If his parents aren't going to teach him right from wrong, clearly it is our civic duty to teach him a lesson! Maybe we should teach this knife ear to keep her mouth shut and respect her betters while we're at it!"

"Would this issue be resolved if he were to return the coin purse and apologize? There's no need for any of this bullshit."

"He already got rid of it, he said." Another one of the men pitched in, snorting. "I'm sure his little buddies have gone and spent it all on candy already. Miserable little wretches. All these refugees, bringing their dirty little children into our city and letting them run amok, do as they please."

 _Or they were buying food, because they're starving, you moron. Bloody Free Marchers._

It couldn't be helped. I sighed, digging around for my own coin purse and tossing it to the nearest one of the humans.

"Will that cover what he stole? If that'll do, let him go. He's just a hungry child, you're the ones making asses of yourselves picking on him. If that was a Free Marcher boy right there, you would have fed him without a second thought."

The coin purse was passed around to the 'gentleman' while he carelessly tossed the boy aside, the homeless child scurrying off as fast as his thin legs could take him. Now I was facing three grown men alone while the coin was being counted. It was all I had, but it was going to be worth it to make sure that child was safe.

"Hah! Five silvers? The kid stole at **least** three sovereigns! This won't be enough. You're going to have to pay off the rest somehow, now that he's run off…I'm sure we can think of something that you can do for us, can't we, boys?"

I'm not a mage, but I don't need any form of magic to guess what the hell was likely going through their minds right now. Humans are absolutely disgusting creatures. Andraste would be rolling over in her grave if she knew what had become of the people that she gave her life for so long ago.

Well…too bad for these boys. I'm pretty damn fast. Like a halla, I was gone in a flash, taking off on bare feet down the crumbling streets of Darktown. They likely hadn't expected me to bolt so fast, because they stood there, dumbfounded, while I left them in the dust. Looks like I wasn't going to be sleeping in my tent tonight…just in case they decided to stick around and wait for me to come back. No way in hell was I going to be THAT stupid. Humans are so predictable sometimes. It's kind of amusing, really.

The weather definitely wasn't. One second, I'm running through the exits of Darktown to escape in the Lowtown evening crowds. The next, it's pouring down rain. The rain didn't bother me, it was just making the roads slippery against my bare feet. By now, I hadn't seen hide nor hair of the humans. If they had even tried to make chase, they weren't keeping up with me. Once I hit the market's crowd of folks, I slowed down and slipped into an easy fast walk, blending in with the folks rushing around and trying to get out of the rain. Most people were just flooding into the Hanged Man while the rest were scurrying about to head into their homes. I just kind of followed the traffic, enjoying my little game of hide and seek.

My game wasn't going to be fun for long. I could see the group of men searching around when I passed through the market for maybe the sixth time. They were just as rain-drenched as I was, and not looking too pleased about it. I had to duck behind a rather tall gentleman to my left so they didn't catch sight of me. The crowds were starting to thin. I needed a plan of escape or they were going to be on my tail in a flash. Definitely not back to Darktown, and Lowtown would be the next obvious choice. It was why they were looking here after all. Hightown would be the best bet, though the crowds would be practically nonexistent with the rich folk at home or in the brothel. There would be very few places to hide. Still, it was my best option. I knew a few shortcuts that would get me into Hightown without being seen. Already I was slipping down a familiar alleyway to go up towards the top sector of the city.

As I figured, the place was rather deserted. My feet slapped against the wet pavement as I scurried through the Hightown market, zipping through back streets and alleys to make sure I could lose them. Even through the pounding rain, I could still hear what I thought were footsteps in the distance. I hate these days. The days that I just have to keep running and never look back. No time to stand still, or settle down. Never staying in one city for too long. New places, new faces…

My thoughts apparently had distracted me from the predicament at hand. I was running on instinct while my mind wandered. Eventually, something caught my attention, and that something was an arm reaching out of a nearby alleyway and dragging me into the shadows, one arm latching around my middle and another clamping over my mouth, just when I was about ready to scream. I was nearly slipping into a state of panic, but no more than ten seconds later, the Free Marcher men that had been in hot pursuit of me whizzed right on by the alley and down the street. I can't believe that actually worked and they hadn't seen us! They were closer to my trail than I had thought they'd been. Curse my wandering mind.

A minute ticked by, two minutes, and I stood still like that for a long time. Things were starting to become painfully apparent to me that this was a friend, not a foe. Being pressed up against a solid armored body with exposed skin along the arms showing off rather familiar white markings made it obvious that Fenris had somehow come to my aid. Finally, he released me and I stumbled back a bit so we could both straighten ourselves up. He seemed rather unamused, while I was downright flustered at him. How had this turn of events come about?!

"What in the Maker's name are you doing here?!"

"I was about to ask you the same thing. I live in this part of the city. Why are you in Hightown?"

"…I was…uhm…! I-it's none of your business!"

"…You seem to have a talent for getting yourself into trouble."

"I assure you, this is not normal for me. You're probably rubbing some bad luck onto me or something. I thank you for your assistance, Ser Fenris, but now that my pursuers have run off, I can return home."

"You're going to walk all the way back to Darktown in this weather? You're absolutely drenched already. You're going to catch your death out here."

"Well, it's late and it's not like I sleep anywhere else- hey wait a minute! How in the Maker's name did you know that I -?"

"That you lied to Hawke when you said you lived in the Alienage?"

"I was actually just telling Fenris about your little predicament. It was kind of cute how he immediately came to your rescue. Let's just say I have a lot of eyes in this city, darling. It's hard to miss an elf as noticeable as you running through the streets of Lowtown. I got the report rather quickly."

A voice echoed from somewhere above us before a well-tanned Rivaini woman hopped down from a rooftop, landing in the street close to us. I practically jumped out of my skin in surprise while she just laughed. Not only was she the most gorgeous dark-haired beauty I had ever seen, she had her own intimidating aura about herself. Sure, her white corset mini-dress and thigh high boots paired with the blue bandana over her head was a bit revealing and she had a lot of beautiful gold piercings and jewelry to keep her looking feminine, but those knives she had on her person would make anyone nervous. Still, she had a smile as pleasant as any sunny day, which she directed at Fenris. The male elf, however, was not impressed with her words.

"…I am not cute. I was providing a favor to Hawke, since Hawke seems to like her for some strange reason."

"Sure, you were, Fenris…sure you were. In any case, I've given those boys a few good knocks on the head. They'll be out for hours, and you're safe for the moment. You're welcome for doing the dirty work, by the way, Fenris."

I swear, I was going to get a whiplash from spinning my head back and forth listening to them banter. It was starting to make me dizzy.

"…The help was…unnecessary, both of you, but I appreciate it. It's not the first time I've had to weasel out of a sticky situation. I had everything under control."

"Aww, she reminds me of... well, **me** at that age. Nice taste in piercings, too. I think we'll get along nicely, sweet little thing. Anyways, Fenris, this one is all yours. I need to head back to the Hanged Man, I've got some clients to deal with before I enjoy a nice drink."

"Excuse me, I am a lot older than I look, thank you very much!"

"You have **got** to be kidding me, Isabela…you're going to leave me here with her?"

"Later! Don't have too much fun without me!"

Isabela practically pranced away, swinging those hips of hers teasingly while she headed for the closest Hightown exit. Meanwhile, Fenris and I were exchanging looks. I wasn't too happy with him right now, all things considered. He wasn't very happy either, since Isabela had ditched him. It's like he had no social skills whatsoever!

"…You had her spy on me?! That is a complete invasion of my privacy, you creep!"

"…Hawke has a problem with being…too trusting. She's a kind-hearted person to a fault. I owe her a debt, one that I intend to repay, and I can't repay her if she takes a dagger in the back from someone she's helped."

"Like I would do that. I'm completely harmless. I don't even carry around a weapon! Now…Is your paranoia satisfied? If it is, then I'm going home…"

"…Why do you live in Darktown? With your talents, you could easily make coin enough to live in the Alienage comfortably…at least more comfortably than down in an abandoned sewer system. I don't understand it."

"Thanks, but I'll pass. I'm quite happy where I am, thank you very much, and where I choose to rest my head is none of your business. Now, if you don't mind…"

I couldn't tell him. I couldn't tell him that a permanent residency was just…not in the cards. I never stay anywhere long enough to put down roots. It just had to be this way. He would never understand. I sighed, brushing my damp bangs out of my face and glaring up at the other elf for a few brief moments before I turned on my heel. I was soaked from head to foot and it was starting to get cold. I just wanted to go home, but he opened his mouth again.

"…Hawke tells me she invited you to come on the expedition with us."

At that, I paused. So, Hawke had already talked to him about the offer? Damn, was he going to tell her about me lying?!

"…Don't tell Hawke I'm living in a tent in Darktown. She already feels the need to help me beyond what is necessary. I don't want her feeling any more pity for me than she already does. I'm just fine where I'm at. Really."

"…I haven't told her, and I don't plan to. Maybe if you went on the expedition, she wouldn't worry about your wellbeing. Like I said, Hawke is too kind-hearted. She looks out for everyone, whether they are friends or total strangers, especially those who have done her a service."

"Is this some weird form of blackmail, Fenris? Because if it is, you're doing a piss poor job at it."

"…I'm saying the expedition could really use you, and you clearly need the money. I highly suggest you take the job."

"…As I told Hawke, I'm going to think about it. Now, it's getting late, so I'm going to head back."

"…If you insist on going back to that tent, at least move it in case those thugs come back."

"That was the plan in the first place! I'm not stupid!"

"…Could have fooled me."

"Fuck off!"


	4. Dangerous Trails

Chapter 3: Dangerous Trails

In the end, I made the decision to join them on the expedition. I made sure to send a letter to Hawke with my reply, and now I found myself with a light bag packed and slung over my shoulder, standing with the rest of the caravan members, ready to depart from the merchant's district in Hightown. Really, my entire tent and all my supplies fit into my tiny pack. There was no point in leaving anything behind since I didn't have much in the first place. If we were going to be gone for weeks, possibly months, I'd lose anything I left behind in Darktown. Too many sticky fingers that grabbed unattended items.

For once, I was feeling a bit self-conscious. This was a very unusual feeling for me. Most of the people here looked…well…professional. It wasn't just mercenaries for the added muscle, but there where all kinds of educated-looking folk about. I just looked like a dirt-covered ragamuffin standing around awkwardly while everybody else was making their preparations. Thankfully, Hawke and her friends were nearby and ready to go, making me a bit more comfortable. Hawke was busy giving a warm hug to a greying woman that was most likely her mother, Bethany taking her turn when the two women were done saying their goodbyes. Even a mabari, probably the family dog, was waiting for a turn. It was nice to see such a close-knit family.

I smiled at them. It was nice to know that someone as kind as Hawke had a good family that would be waiting for her safe return. Though they would worry every second she was gone, sometimes knowing that someone was out there, waiting for you, gave people the courage to do things like this. It gave them the determination to come home triumphant. I had to admit, I was a little jealous. Nobody would be waiting for me to come home from this adventure. Maybe a time ago there would have been, but not now.

My attention went towards the rest of her group, noting that Anders, Varric and Fenris were patiently waiting for Hawke's goodbyes to come to a close. The other companions that weren't coming along were standing around with the crowd to see Hawke off. They kind of…stood out from the common rabble. I recognized Isabela, but the red-headed woman in set of town guard armor and the pretty Dalish mage were totally new. I'd have to make their acquaintances at a later date, we were getting ready to leave, after all.

I didn't want to be standing around any longer with this pack of strangers surrounding m, so I scurried over towards the familiar trio instead. Varric smiled at me and gave me a clap on the shoulder, Anders nodded warmly in my direction, and Fenris just ignored my presence. Humph. I doubted the two of us were going to get along whatsoever with his cold attitude.

By the time Hawke was done saying goodbye to her family, the dwarf that was apparently leading the expedition, Bartrand, was speaking up to the small army of hirelings he had gathered for the expedition. His voice was rather loud and commanding so he could be heard over the crowd, so I couldn't help but turn to listen. It could be important information to keep in mind, after all. The more you know.

"We've chosen one of the hidden entrances. The Deep Roads there will be nice and virginal, ready for a good deflowering, hah!"

Varric gave a weird cough while I just completely blanched. What did he just say?! By the Maker, that was rather vulgar. Important information, my ass!

"…Now there's an interesting image…"

"That's putting it mildly, Varric…"

"It'll take a week for us to get to the depth that we need, and there are bound to be leftover darkspawn from the Blight. Big risks, big rewards."

This guy didn't seem to be too worried about the daunting task at hand. Thankfully, Hawke spoke up, talking actual sense.

"…We shouldn't be taking any needless risks…"

"This isn't a foolish endeavor. This will work! Now, before we depart, make your final preparations. We're leaving in five minutes."

Our little party glanced amongst ourselves, taking stock of our traveling party and our supplies. All of us seemed to be ready at least. The rest of the caravan was busy packing up and making sure they had all of their supplies loaded up and prepared for whatever we were going to be finding in the Deep Roads.

"I'm glad you decided to join us, Naela. We have a lot of hirelings around here, but your knowledge of herbs will be invaluable. I don't think Bartrand had the sense to hire one, by the looks of it…"

"My brother couldn't find one that wanted to risk their necks going into the Deep Roads. Believe me, he tried to find one in case we find some rare specimens out there. Most herbalists he tried to commission preferred to stay in the safety of their gardens. Kind of ironic really…"

"Hah. They're not real herbalists at all if they aren't willing to get their hands dirty. In any case, I'm happy to tag along. It's nice to get out of the city once in a while, despite our chosen destination. It's rather exciting! I'm ready, if all of you are."

"I've been trying to get this expedition off of the ground for weeks! Of course, I'm ready! Bianca is excited, too."

"…Bianca…?"

"…The dwarf's crossbow. He named it."

Fenris seemed kind of annoyed as he finally spoke up, a pale eyebrow raised at Varric as if questioning his sanity. That seemed like something that would happen often, because the beardless dwarf brushed it off like it was nothing. These people were so strange, but there was that sort of…kinship about them. Sure, they were an odd bunch with so many differences, but they blended well together, as strange as that sounded.

"…Well, why is she called Bianca? Surely there is a story behind that."

"Now **that** is one story I'll never tell."

Thankfully, Bartrand was there to save Varric from explaining why he named his crossbow that particular name. Maybe I'd ask him another time. My curiosity was killing me!

"Personal drama over with? Then, let's get underway."

Everyone in the party glanced at each other briefly before we moved to follow him, Varric pulling up alongside his brother with a confident smile.

"Been a long time coming, eh, Brother?"

"That is has. The Deep Roads await!"

With a raised fist, Bartrand led the caravan forward with so much energy, I thought the tiny man was going to explode. Hmmm. Dwarves are very strange. Really, was this a good idea? So many things could potentially go wrong…

…Just what had I gotten myself into…?

…..

As Bartrand had said, it took us a week to get into the depths of the Deep Roads like we had planned…but, sadly we were stopped short of our destination thanks to a scout discovering that a collapse had blocked any further travel through our original path down. We ended up making camp earlier than we had wanted to. While the others were off talking to Bartrand about our options, the rest of us not-so-adventurous types were setting up our camps for a brief respite. Most of us had been walking for hours and complaining about sore legs and feet.

Me, on the other hand? I was enjoying the trip, taking in the sights. I'd never been to the Deep Roads before, and I was excited to get to see what kind of architecture and treasures we'd find further in. Sure, my bare feet were looking a little worse for the wear, but I didn't mind it much. I was used to rough terrain on are feet anyway. I still refused to wear shoes, despite Anders's insistence. He'd tried to check on my feet a few times over the course of the trip, but I'd avoided it every single time.

Finally, Hawke came over towards me and I got up from my little camp, raising my eyebrow in curiosity. It looked like she had something important to say. Maybe conveying Bartrand's next orders? There was no way he was going to give up now, dwarves were too stubborn.

"We're going to go ahead into the side passages and see if we can find a way around the cave-in."

"…Didn't Bartrand's scouts say it was far too dangerous?"

"I think we can handle whatever's down there. You going to be all right here with the rest of the crew, Angel?"

"Yes, I should be fine. I'll just have to keep myself occupied somehow. Maybe I can help out around the camp, or explore within a reasonable distance to see if I can find some plants. Besides, finding deep mushrooms in caves above ground is rather tedious, I'm sure I can find a steady supply of them down here and stock up! I think the alchemists would prefer fresh ingredients over the dried stock we have right now."

"Sounds like an excellent idea. We'll be back later, all right?"

"Please be careful, Hawke! There may be few darkspawn, but darkspawn are still darkspawn."

"We'll be careful, promise, and we'll be back before you know it! Varric, Anders, Fenris? Let's go."

I sighed, watching them leave into one of the dark side passages without hesitation. Maybe I should have asked the alchemists to give them extra potions, just in case? Well, too late now, they were already gone and probably out of my reach. I sighed, shaking my head and turning my attention to the camp stretched out around me. Might as well make myself useful around here, right? I dusted myself off and waded through the camp, looking around to make sure nobody needed any assistance. So far, everyone was nestled in their camps comfortably.

Most of the folks refused to even look at me as I passed by. The few that did, well…gave me either strange or dirty looks when they thought I wasn't looking. Guess no one wanted to socialize with a 'filthy knife ear'. I quickly gave up on any prospect of giving any of these people a hand. They likely wouldn't accept it or they'd continue to ignore me. Either way, it was up to me to keep myself occupied until the rest of my companions returned.

With a sigh, I went to go retrieve my herb basket and slip away into the entrance of one of the side passages. I wasn't going to go far enough inside to attract danger, I just wanted to check for mushrooms. It was going to be a simple trip…! That, well…kind of lasted a few hours instead of a few minutes. I found several mushroom patches inside the side passages and kept stopping to harvest the best ones, but I made sure to keep my eyes open for any signs of danger and didn't go any deeper down the tunnels than was necessary.

I lost track of the time rather quickly. When I finally finished my exploration, I headed back to camp only to find that my companions came back, looking a little worn out, but triumphant. They must have found a way around, because everywhere I looked the camp was being picked up and repacked. I was already scrambling to catch up, dismantling the tent and throwing everything into my bag a bit hastily so I could rejoin Hawke and the others. It was time to get a move on, and the caravan was moving out the second everything was repacked. Bartrand and Varric were leading the way, talking excitedly while I fell into pace with Hawke, Anders and Fenris. I had to take two to three steps for every one of their steps to keep up. Curse my small body!

"Found the way through, Hawke?"

"We did! We eventually found a path that'll take us straight to where Bartrand was wanting to go. We shouldn't have to walk too much farther to get there now that the way is clear of darkspawn and spiders."

"So, the scouts were right; the passages weren't safe at all. Is everyone all right?"

"It was nothing that we couldn't handle. I've been in the Deep Roads a few times before, so at least we know what to expect down here."

"Wait, you've been down here before?"

"I used to be a Grey Warden, of course I've been in the Deep Roads. Did I neglect to mention that…?"

"You did! I've actually never met a Grey Warden before! They say that you're immune to the darkspawn taint. Is that true?"

"It is true, we're immune to it."

"You also neglected to tell her that you're possessed by a demon."

"Wait, what!?"

I turned my head to look at Fenris incredulously. That was the first thing I had heard come out of his mouth all day. Not only that, but it was a rather serious accusation. How rude! There was no way that Anders was possessed! He was far too nice to be possessed by a demon. Most of the time, demons can be a bit obvious when they possess someone. It's rather hard to miss with the odd uncharacteristic behavior they display.

"…That's not the truth, Fenris, and you know it. Stop telling her lies."

"You simply coat the truth in honey, _abomination_."

"Oh, would both of you stop it already?! You're acting like children. This is no time for bickering in the first place! We have a job to do. Anders, feel free to explain, now that Fenris has dropped the information rather unceremoniously on the poor girl's head."

"…Justice is _not_ a demon. He's…"

"…A spirit of justice, right?"

"How did you know?"

"…I've…picked a few things up over the years from the Dalish I run into occasionally. Most people don't understand that there are benevolent spirits that embody the good traits of humanity, while demons embody the bad ones. Justice is one of the good ones, for obvious reasons. Nobody ever really stops to think or to study the good spirits. 'They are from the Fade, so they are obviously bad', right?"

"…Right. This spirit was trapped outside of the Fade, unable to return. He needed a host, or he was going to disappear forever."

"Oh, I get it. So rather than force himself upon someone else or letting him vanish, you volunteered to help him. That's rather noble of you. Even if it's a good spirit, it's still daunting to have someone else around you at all times, invisible but ever present. That's one of the nicest things I've ever heard a person doing for a spirit."

"See? SHE gets it. Thank you, Naela, I appreciate that."

"The world isn't as black and white as everyone likes to think it is."

I made sure to give Fenris a bit of a dirty look. I usually don't hate people, but I hate him enough that I've found myself easily dropping curse words at him and just generally unable to stand his ever-brooding presence. He's like a dark cloud looming over everyone with his negativity. He only returned my irritable look with one of his own before he turned his attention back to Bartrand and Varric, who led the way through the complicated tunnel systems. Finally, we stopped at the expansive set of ruins stretched out in front of us.

So far, the trip had been nothing but caves filled with junk, excavating equipment, or endless staircases of stone leading into nothing. Here, it was looking like actual ruins, with ancient carvings and beautiful stonework. Still, this was... different, in other ways. There were spots here and there where blue crystals gave us light, but I could see these bright red…veins…growing all over the place.

This place was…strange. It wasn't just the red lights and ruby crystals everywhere that made it so terribly ominous. Something was…wrong here. There was an odd energy in the air, one that I hadn't encountered before. Then again, I don't usually take trips into dark and foreboding places such as this. I was out of my element on this one.

"…Holy shit…"

Varric was the first to speak up, glancing around with wide eyes as they stared at the entrance to what could be the expedition's ticket to success.

"…Is this what you were expecting?"

Even Anders was surprised, and he was rather familiar with the Deep Roads. Did the Grey Wardens go down this far? Probably not, since Anders didn't know that this was here, either.

"I thought…an abandoned thaig, something old, but…what is this?"

"How did you even know it was here?"

That was a really good question from Hawke. How DID he know this was down here?

"Old scavenger tales. After the Third Blight. A week below the surface, they said, but nobody believed them…"

"Looks like they were right."

I was enjoying Varric's interest in the find, I truly was, but... those scavengers had found something...disturbing. I could feel it in the air. This place was old…very old. Still, that strange energy was giving me the chills as we stepped closer. Something was…wrong here. I wasn't quite sure how I could tell, but I had a bad feeling about this place.

"Make camp here! We need to look around!"

Bartrand's shrill voice yanked me out of my musings. Right, camp! I was already setting about joining the rest of the caravan with setting up the camp and watching as the scouts took off to go explore, including Hawke and friends. It didn't take me long to set up my own things, so I decided that I'd go tag along with them. Nobody else in the caravan wanted to talk to me, and exploring on my own in an area even more unknown than the Deep Roads was probably not a good idea. I'm confident in my abilities to keep out of trouble, don't get me wrong, but that strange energy was giving me pause. I didn't want to go wandering off on my own. Instead, I caught up with them after they finished a brief chat with Bartrand and some other dwarves.

"Tagging along, Angel?"

"I have nothing better to do but look for herbs. There could be a rare species growing down here in the darkness, after all. I'd rather not rely on Bartrand's hirelings to keep me safe, thank you very much. So far, they've been less than useless. You lot are doing all of the work, as far as I can tell."

"That seems to be the case…hold up, what's that?"

Hawke stopped as our path led us farther into the ruins, nothing but eerie red light showing us the rocky path farther down. Even worse, that strange energy I'd been feeling was getting stronger. Whatever the source is, we were getting closer. I was about ready to turn tail and head back to camp when Varric spoke up.

"Hmmm. Whatever's through there, it seems still intact. Think we'll find anything?"

"Bartrand is far more enthralled with this place than you are."

"Unlike him, I wasn't born in Orzammar. I wouldn't even be down here if there wasn't profit in it. This entire place gives me the chills. Let's hope it's worth it."

 _So, it's not just me, possibly…is Varric just creeped out in general by these ruins, or is he feeling the same energy I am…?_

"Whatever we find, it might not be very pleasant…"

Anders was right, something unpleasant was definitely down there. I wanted to turn back, but Varric was already on the move, descending down the pathway.

"Humph. I suppose we'll need to go down there to find out."

Of course, we'd hardly taken two steps and I spotted the familiar shadowy shapes out of the corner of my eye: Shades. They were the most common and basic physical form of lesser demons. Those were accompanied by what looked like stone golems moving about. Right…the dwarves had made their first golems out of stone, so there was bound to be many of them here.

I stepped towards the back of the party immediately while everyone else drew weapons and jumped into the fray, cutting the monsters down mercilessly as we made progress down the crimson-illuminated path. I could only stay out of the way and watch quietly while they cleared the way with relative ease. They were practiced fighters and good at working as a unit, so the threat was gone within moments thanks to swords, sorcery, and arrows. At least the caravan would be able to come down safely later.

 _Why are Shades even HERE, of all places? Something is so very wrong; I can feel it! We need to leave; this isn't worth it…!_

Thankfully, that was the only handful of trouble we ran into. The surprisingly short path led down to a door, in which all of us promptly headed through once we realized that it was unlocked. It was here that I was most tempted to turn and flee. The energy…it was here. The long corridor only led to another door; the hallway was lit on either side by lava pools lining the edges of the floor. Whatever was behind that door…it wasn't good. It was such a negative, gnawing energy…!

Our group headed in without so much as a second thought. I scurried right along behind them, only because I didn't want to be left alone. Every nerve was screaming for me to turn back, but I had to see what was causing this eerie sensation right down to my very marrow. That, and a not-so-small portion of me was telling me not to leave my new friends alone with whatever was causing this monstrous energy to radiate and rock me to my core.

Stepping into the room, I nearly vomited instantly. It was definitely coming from in here, the aura was far too potent. There was a dramatic stairway leading up to a large stone podium carved into the rock, upon which sat a glistening red object. It looked like it was made out of…lyrium? Really? Such an unusual substance to carve into art…and lyrium was typically blue in color, not red.

I just about fell too my knees as I got closer and closer to the center of the room, the party happily rushing up while I took my time. The idol, it had to be the idol in the room that was causing this sensation. It didn't appear to be bothering anyone but me. Thankfully, nobody had taken notice as of yet. Instead, I hung back close at the bottom of the stairs while everyone else headed up the steps to check out the idol. What kind of lyrium had THIS sort of effect on me…? I ended up moving to lean on one of the support pillars at the sides of the room while the others talked.

"…You seeing what I'm seeing?"

Varric was absolutely fascinated with the thing while Hawke was giving it a suspicious look.

"Is that…lyrium?"

"It's definitely magic…and not the good kind."

I had to agree with Anders. That thing was…evil, whatever it was. The longer I stayed near it, the sicker I felt. It was taking all of my effort to keep from revealing my condition to the others. They would know something was up with me if they took notice.

"Doesn't look like any lyrium I've ever seen."

I doubted anyone had seen lyrium like this, even though Varric seemed like a dwarf that knew more than he let on. What WAS this terrible substance…?

Footsteps echoed behind me and our group turned to see Bartrand entering the thaig. Everyone focused their attention on the incoming dwarf…except for Fenris. He spotted me and gave me a furrowed brow. I turned my head to watch Bartrand come in, acting like I was fine. Of all people, I didn't want HIM fussing over me. I'd never hear the end of it, and I knew that he only cared about my safety because Hawke did, not because he himself was concerned.

"Look at this, Bartrand! An idol made out of pure lyrium; I think! Could be worth a fortune!"

Bartrand emitted a low whistle as he glanced up at his brother, rather impressed at the news.

"You could be right…excellent find."

My face went pale as I watched Hawke approach the idol.

 _Don't touch it! For the love of the Maker, DON'T TOUCH IT! IT'S EVIL!_

…She touched it without a single problem and handed it over to Varric.

"Not bad. We'll take a look around, see if there is anything further in."

Varric carefully tossed the idol towards his brother. My eyes were glued to that wicked thing as it sailed through the air. It was…whispering. I couldn't make heads or tails of what it was saying, but that was only freaking me out even more. I slid down the pillar, letting my rear end hit the floor. I'd had enough of that blasted idol. Bartrand caught it, looking over the idol carefully before moving to leave the thaig.

"…You do that."

The others preoccupied themselves with searching the rest of the room while Fenris specifically moved to approach me. Ever the observant one of the group, apparently. He seemed like that kind of person, always on the look out for trouble, glancing over his shoulder. No wonder he noticed. He gave me a scrutinizing look as I stood. I was already feeling better with the idol being taken from the room.

Before he could even open his mouth to question my odd behavior, I noticed it out of the corner of my eye at about the same time Hawke did: the door to the thaig was closing behind Bartrand!

"The door!"

She shouted out and rushed towards the door, the rest of the party in full pursuit. Even with Fenris and I being the closest ones to the door, nobody managed to reach it in time before the stone door slid shut. They tried to open it back up again, but it just wouldn't budge!

"Bartrand! It's shut behind you!"

I could hear laughter from the other side…laughter clearly coming from Bartrand.

"…You always did notice everything, Varric."

"…Are you joking?! You're going to screw over your own brother for a lousy idol?!"

Varric was pissed, understandably so. He just locked us all in!

"It's not just the idol! The location of this thaig alone is worth a fortune, and I'm not splitting that three ways! Sorry, Brother!"

"Bartrand! Baaaaartrand!"

…But it was too late. I could hear his footsteps fading down the hallway and out of earshot. He had just abandoned us all…for money! I knew I shouldn't have come on this trip, especially when greedy temptations were involved!

"…I swear I will find that son of a bitch – sorry, Mother – and I will **kill** him! Ugh, let's hope there's a way out of here… Angel, stay close."

"…Right…"

The initial shock of us potentially being trapped underground wore off quickly, and I was feeling better now that the idol had been removed from the room completely. Fenris still gave me an odd look, but now wasn't the time. We all had to get busy finding a way out. Thankfully, there was a door on the opposite side of the thaig. It was our only option at this point, whether it led deeper in or gave us a way out. With us being separated from the caravan, we had only the supplies we were carrying as well as our wits to get us out of this mess. Things just got a LOT more complicated.


	5. Broken

Chapter 4: Broken

That back door was thankfully unlocked and unguarded, giving us all a potential way out of this hellhole. It led us out into another small hallway. To our left was a door, to the right, a longer hallway. Which way was better to go? Anders made a decision quickly, opening the door on the left. We had to check every option, right? Surely, we'd find safe passage through eventually.

Well…he opened a door to a dead-end room full of rubble, crystal, and more of those red lyrium veins sprouting everywhere…plus more golems and Shades. They turned to us as soon as the stone door swung open, making menacing ethereal noises at us like vicious ghosts from across the room. There were very brief glances exchanged between them before they all charged into the room, intercepting the beasts before they came out into the close-quarters hallway and gave us no room to fight.

"Stay here, Naela!"

As directed, I stayed out of the fight, waiting outside of the room for them to blast, slice, and shoot their way to victory. Fireballs were raining everywhere, hails of arrows came down on their heads, all while Hawke and Fenris were cutting through their numbers with little effort. It was all well-practiced, like they had done this so many times together already. They worked together well. There was blood everywhere, very little of it belonging to my companions. The cloaked ghosts and the rock beasts were dropping like flies all around the room with their combined efforts.

No sooner had they almost finished dealing with the monsters IN the room, I turned around to find three more Shades had joined the party, appearing behind me. I went dashing into the room to get out of the way of the oncoming beasts, narrowly avoiding getting clawed by the ghostly terrors sneaking up behind me. How had I been so careless?!

Anders covered my escape with a blast of ice, letting the makeshift wall cover the door while he pulled me behind him protectively. Having to be tugged and yanked along like a rag doll for my own safety was…getting a bit annoying, I had to admit.

"That's not going to hold them for long!"

There was still one of the bigger golems left in the room, and Fenris was in the middle of blocking one of the massive fists with his blade while Hawke was coming at it from behind with her daggers.

"We're a bit busy here, mage! Deal with the problem!"

The ice was starting to crack! Oh boy! Here comes trouble!

"Varric, give me a hand!"

"Got you covered!"

As soon as the ice wall went down, a barrage of arrows and a blast of a fireball went sailing through the doorway, obliterating the Shades while the golem behind us fell apart from the relentless onslaught of blades. Several more tried slipping into the room after their brothers fell, but the party regrouped and kept them out, Fenris in the front to hold them off and everyone else was in the back, slinging magic, arrows and knives as projectiles over his head to blast them into tiny pieces. It was a miracle that he didn't get his hair singed, that last fireball was too close for comfort.

I breathed a sigh of relief, shaking my head while I dusted myself off. This was NOT what I had signed up for! I came here to help Hawke, not get obliterated by the forces of darkness after the expedition leader left us for dead!

"THAT…was too close for comfort…!"

"You nearly got yourself killed. The dwarf said to stay close!"

"Stay back, stay close! You are going to have to pick one and stick with it!"

"Fenris, leave her be. It isn't like this is a situation she deals with every day, like we do."

"She certainly gets into enough trouble to know better, Hawke…"

My urge to deck Fenris right in his jaw was definitely increasing the more he ticked me off. Everybody else was already moving to leave while the two of us were bickering and glaring at each other. I stomped right after them, hurrying to catch up while Fenris took up the rear side of the party. Well, clearly that had been the wrong direction to go, so now we were going to the right hallway and heading through.

The hallway veered off to the left, opening into a massive chamber full of more crystal with a stairway on the left and right leading down onto the main floor. More of the grotesque one-eyed Shades were waiting for us on the stairs and in the ruins of the chamber. Once again, I had to sit back and wait for everyone else to do the skull bashing while I just watched. I was absolutely useless to them, really. I wasn't actually useless…but I had to feign that I was.

 _This isn't fair to them…you know it isn't…_

 _…I have no choice, I can't fight…_

 _There is always a choice. Always being the coward…_

 _I'm protecting our asses here. I can't do it…_

The exit only held more surprises for us: rock wraiths. Those were supposed to be just a dwarven legend, but here they were, blocking the exit. Thankfully, a few well-placed fireballs were enough to shatter them before they caused any real harm. While I was busy with my internal struggle and yelling at the pesky little voice in the back of my mind, Varric was swearing up a storm. Meanwhile, the party was moving to head out of the room.

"Bloody flames! What were those things?"

Well…he should have known the answer to that already. Then again, this thaig was a lot older than they suspected, and none of this was recognizable. I sighed, heading down the stairs to follow the group to the ground floor of the chamber and through the small hallway that led us out. Hallways, hallways, hallways! It led us to yet another long hallway on the left with Shades and rock wraiths blocking our way and a pocket of Shades at the dead-end to our right. Even better, a pack of Shades were coming up behind us!

Hawke pulled me behind her while Anders set up ice walls to block off the back and left hallways so we could take a second to deal with the small force on the right. Hawke ended up pulling the two of us against the only secure wall while the monsters were taken down one by one, the situation carefully controlled by Anders's ice wall and some of Hawke's smoke bombs when cover was needed to create brief moments of opportunity to take down the bigger foes. It was absolute chaos, but the group was handling it well.

The end of the hallway had another door, but this area was different. Most of the floor was gone, perhaps a bridge at some point? It was still intact, but whatever stonework made up the ground was ruined, leaving nothing but dirt and rocks, and empty air on either side of this walkway, the area mysteriously drenched in fog. Only a few jagged stalagmites filled up the empty space, hinting at a potentially dangerous fall if one wasn't careful. The stone archways adorning the passage were still intact, but the red lyrium veins were growing around them, like much of this entire thaig. Thankfully, their energy was weak, meaning I wasn't feeling sickly from them.

More Shades were covering this bridge, so once again I had to step back and watch as everyone else charged into the fray. I was observantly watching the fight, making sure everything was going as smoothly as possible.

Our luck couldn't last, not with how much the universe likes to screw people. Once the Shades were dealt with, two more rock wraiths came stomping forward at their slow gait. Fenris dashed forward with his two-handed sword, aiming to cut one of the beasts down. A pointed rock acting as the wraith's 'arm' was coming down to slam into the bridge's delicate surface along the crumbling, weak edges. Had Fenris not noticed?! He had put himself into mortal danger because of his lack of attention to his surroundings!

I knew exactly what was going to happen. Fenris was going to fall to his potential death once the rock wraith smashed into the bridge and broke it. He was going to die if I didn't do something.

The world was moving in slow motion as I went running forward without thinking.

"FENRIS!"

The stone fist collided with the bridge, the ground underneath of the elf crackling and crumbling until I saw him falling into the darkness. I hit the bridge quickly, dropping to the ground and sliding across the rough surface and scraping up my legs as I too slipped over the side. I barely managed to grab his hand with one of mine and then grab hold of the last little scraps of the bridge's edge just in the nick of time. I definitely pulled something in the process of catching a man that size, but at least he wasn't a pancake at the bottom of this strange place.

"I've got you, hang on! I'll pull you up!"

"Are you crazy?! You're going to get yourself killed! I'm too heavy for you, you'll fall! Let me go!"

"I won't!"

He was safe…just for a second though. No sooner had Fenris given his warning, I saw his eyes widen in surprise as he stared at something behind me. His look prompted me to turn my head and look back up at the bridge. The wraith was upon us, his jagged rock fist coming down upon my own hand, the lifeline keeping us tumbling into the abyss. Blood sprayed, bones cracked, and I let go of the bridge when I lost my grip with my freshly injured hand. The panicked screams of our comrades rang in my ears as we fell.

Empty air. That was all I was feeling as the pair of us tumbled into darkness. I made another split-second decision, pulling myself to Fenris's torso and gripping him tightly, making sure I was the one facing the ground and not him. I'm small, but I can at least protect his head, neck and torso; his most vital parts. I'd hit the ground first when we finally collided with whatever was below. As long as we didn't hit a stalagmite and impale ourselves, he'd be a lot safer than I was.

I could have saved myself. I could have let him fall in the first place; I could have let him go and pulled myself up before the wraith came at me. I could have done a lot of things…but sometimes the most difficult thing is the right thing to do. Sure, maybe I couldn't be a hero and fight the monsters because of some silly code I was still clinging to. But…there were still a few lives I could save, even if it was going to hurt.

And this…was going to hurt. A lot.

…..

I felt sick. I felt tired. My body…I could tell it was bad from how much pain I was in. There was a heavy ache all over, like an unseen pressure coming at me from all sides, constricting me. That much pain, I could handle. Most of my arm felt like it was in tatters, like it was ready to just fall off any second. I was sure that I would have lost that hand for real if it wasn't for my regenerative abilities. My back and sides were the worst pains, and the rampaging headache throbbing behind my eyes was a good indication my skull had taken a beating. I could tell my ribs were cracked, if they weren't completely broken. I'd have to actually move to find out.

Still…I was alive. I was still debating if that was a good thing or not.

It was so hard for me to breathe, but I discovered the reason why very quickly. There as a heavy weight on top of me, the familiar feel of cold steel pressing against my skin.

…Right. That was probably Fenris. Had he survived the fall!? Was he okay?! If he died anyway…this would have all been for nothing!

It was a struggle to get up. My injured hand was useless, and I'd clearly pulled some muscles in the rest of my arm from catching him and trying to hold him up. I simply let it hang at my side to try and regenerate while I carefully rolled Fenris off of me and onto his back on the floor beside me. I had to make sure that he was still alive!

…He was still breathing from the rise and fall of his chest, and there was a pulse when I searched for it at his neck. Good. I couldn't tell if he'd been injured in the fall or what. There was too much armor in the way, and I wasn't about to waste time stripping him down to check. He was in one piece and he wasn't bleeding everywhere, so he should have been okay…right? I was never very good with this medical crap.

The next part was going to be the real struggle. He seemed to be out cold, and I had no idea where we were. How far had we fallen? I looked up, but there was nothing except for endless pitch black. The sounds of battle were long gone. It looked like we were still in the ruins of the thaig, just…a lot farther down. Everything was a lot less preserved down here. Everything around me was similar to the architecture from above, just…crumbling. Ruined. More what you would expect from this underground hellhole. From here, there was no telling which way was the correct way. Endless doors and hallways were clear to see from where I sat. A maze like this was going to take an eternity to find our way out of!

I sighed, steeling myself and raising up onto my feet. It wasn't without difficulty, but I managed. Sitting around and staring at everything wasn't going to get us out of here. I had to save Fenris, at the very least. As much as I disliked him for how…unpleasant he had been, he was still looking out for me. It was about time I returned the favor; don't you think?

With much effort, I pulled Fenris off of the ground as carefully as possible. Having only one usable arm wasn't really making this any easier. He was a much taller and broader figure than me, I'm terribly tiny even for an elf. I had to hold him against me with my good arm, while the other painfully kept one of his arms slung around my shoulders so I could carry his weight. I was pushing my physical limits with my injuries, and well aware of that. Still, it was going to be slow going if I had to do everything with one arm. We didn't have the luxury of wasting time with a lack of supplies and untreated wounds.

"…You'd better not die. Hawke still needs you. I bet…she is looking for us, right now…gods, you're heavy…! Is this your armor, or are you just that bulky underneath?! You definitely don't look like you weigh this much, you gangly ass…"

Why the hell am I talking to an unconscious person? It's not like he can even hear me. Well…I suppose it was helping to pass the time while I walked. I was going to have to try to work through this maze and find the way back up to the group, or perhaps escape this hell entirely. Whichever came first. Hopefully, the others were all right…

…..

How long had I been walking? Minutes, hours. Felt like days, honestly. The hallways and corridors were absolutely endless. I'd lost count of how many dead ends I'd run into and had to backtrack to find another way out. My body was aching the more I walked, and Fenris's added weight wasn't helping. Still, I pressed on, even as exhaustion sunk in and my vision got blurry.

I don't know when I blacked out. I must have at some point, because I was waking up with no recollection of ever falling asleep. There was this…rocking motion. I was swaying back and forth. It was making me feel sick. I didn't even want to open my eyes, I just wanted to go back to the painless bliss that is sleep, but I couldn't. A shifting motion made me groan; my ribs were burning from the movement. I just wanted to get away and find some dark corner to go be miserable in, but somebody wasn't going to let me get far.

"…Stop squirming, or I'm going to drop you."

 _Fenris?_

Blinking the sleep from my eyes, I finally cracked them open. Well, now I know where the swaying motion is coming from. He had me situated on his back while he continued walking through the maze that was the thaig. So far, it looked like he had made considerably more progress than I did. Tight corridors were changing into grand hallways and rooms that I hoped we had seen before. Whereas I had been hopelessly lost, Fenris had found the way. Some heroine I was!

"…You've been unconscious for quite some time. I couldn't wake you."

I guess I did pass out. My body had reached its limits. Shouldn't I have recovered at least a little bit by now?! Perhaps it was the exposure to the red lyrium. It was very rare for me to have run-ins with the substance, but it always affected me in negative ways. No matter, I needed to push on. Giving up and letting myself die here would be unforgiveable.

"…Put me down, I'll walk…you need your arms in case we run into darkspawn…"

That certainly didn't come out very imposing. My throat was terribly dry, it came out like a frog croak instead of actual speech. Fenris just scoffed at me and shook his head.

"You're not walking. We both just fell from an incredible height and survived. Besides getting the wind knocked out of me, I've only got some bruises. You, however, are not. You broke my fall. Somehow, you're still breathing. By all rights, you should be dead just from the impact to your skull. Even then, you were trying to drag me around. You are **clearly** suicidal."

"…But…"

"If we run into trouble, then I'll put you down. Until then, you're not going anywhere with those injuries. I lost count of how many rib bones you broke, let alone your whole body. You just about dislocated your shoulder trying to catch me."

Had he actually checked me over? I wasn't aware that he had some first aid skills. Oh! Only when he mentioned something did I notice that my left arm with the shattered hand was put into a makeshift sling out of ripped fabric. He must have popped my shoulder back into place while I was out. I was surprised even that didn't wake me before. I must have been completely out of it.

"…Fenris, I'm just going to slow you down if you have to carry me. Face it, this isn't the safest option…"

I think he was getting tired of my protests. He grumbled under his breath and repositioned his grip on me rather suddenly, making me groan quietly.

"…Would you give it a rest? I'm not leaving here without you. You already get yourself into enough trouble all on your own as it is. As much as I dislike babysitting you, Hawke would only blame herself if you got killed on this expedition because she insisted on you coming along."

"As far as I recall, you blackmailed me into coming, Fenris."

"Only because of Hawke's soft heart."

"You really are devoted to her, aren't you?"

"I owe her a debt I cannot hope to repay."

"…What kind of debt? I know Hawke is the helpful sort. You seem like you can handle yourself."

"…Hawke and her companions helped me out of a tough spot. They took on at least a dozen Tevinter slavers that were after me. I could not even hope to have faced that many alone."

"Slavers were chasing you?"

"They were being paid to return a magister's lost property…namely, myself."

"…So, you're an escaped slave? I'm…sorry, Fenris."

No wonder he seemed to have such a terrible hatred for mages. Tevinter magisters did anything in the name of power, even resorting to blood magic to get the upper hand on each other. Slavery was common in Tevinter, whereas the rest of the world had outlawed it. Slavers were still rampant in the Free Marches, however, kidnapping people against their will and smuggling them out to Tevinter to sell them.

Maybe I had been judging him too harshly as of late. He…understood. Constantly running, just to keep your life and freedom. I could relate to this strange elf, all things considered.

"…You are apologizing. Why? I am in no need of your pity, nor do I want it."

"…In the past, I have judged you too harshly for your hatred of magic and your…paranoid attitude. Now I can understand why you are…. the way you are. I do not pity you. It takes great courage to step away from slavery and to find your freedom. Some slaves never wish for freedom, because they have never known anything else. It's…easier. To have someone else think for you…to just do what you're told. Even after you've discovered the taste of a free world, you have to fight to keep it…"

I shook my head of my musings, glancing over at the nearest wall to distract and recompose myself.

"…Sorry, I'm just rambling without thought. You must be considered quite valuable to have him chase you so relentlessly."

"He doesn't want me, just the markings on my skin."

"…I always wanted to ask about them, but you aren't very…approachable."

In this time and place, for some reason, it was just a lot easier to converse with him. I suppose surviving a near-death experience can do that to people. It was helping to pass the time, as well. For once, I actually heard Fenris laughing at me and my little jab.

"…I suppose not. Being with Hawke and the others is the first time I've really…had people to rely on."

"You two sound like you're practically lovers."

"…We are not. Hawke's interest is with the abomination."

"…You mean Anders. Why don't you like him? He seems to be all right, for a mage."

"You have yet to meet the spirit that possesses him. Once you see it for yourself, you will understand."

"…Is it really that bad? I thought this spirit was…"

"…What the mage said isn't the FULL story. Maybe it was a benevolent spirit once…but no longer. Not since it possessed him. It's corrupt and violent now."

Things lapsed into silence after that, for a time. There was nothing but the sound of our footsteps echoing through the halls for a long time before he finally spoke up again.

"…You wanted to ask…about the markings. They are lyrium, burned into my flesh."

"So, that's how you phase through objects. Was it done willingly, or did your former master force it upon you?"

"…I would tell you, if I could remember. Everything from before the markings…whatever ritual was used caused me great pain and wiped every memory away. Not even my name is my own. Fenris is a name that my former master gave to me."

"…That's…got to be rough…to not remember things. To not know yourself…from before."

His words struck at my very core. It was almost like looking into a mirror. There were a few similarities there that I could see, plain as day. Though he wasn't aware of it…I understood him more than I thought I did.

"…I hope you get those memories back someday, Fenris. I really do…"

Things lapsed into silence again as Fenris seemed to be musing over something. I sighed, gently closing my eyes again. My body was screaming at me to get more rest, take advantage of the peace and quiet for now. I really needed to take the time to recover, but the universe was going to fuck us over again and refuse my simple request once again. I could faintly pick up the sounds in the distance. Footsteps…lots of them. Rushed _._ Darkspawn? Very likely.

"…You hear that?"

"…I hear nothing…wait. Now I hear it…"

"…Could it be the darkspawn? That sounds like too many people for it to be the others, or even the rest of the expedition. Their footsteps are moving too fast…"

"…You think you can walk for a little while?"

"I'll be fine. I'd rather you have your sword arm ready."

He was already moving to carefully put me down, making sure I could stand reasonably upright before he drew that massive greatsword in preparation. Sure, we were going to do our best to avoid the horde, but we had to be ready for any stragglers, or if our escape plans failed and they found us.

The name of the game was to move quickly and quietly, which I was doing neither. Even with a good chunk of sleep under my belt, I wasn't feeling any improvement. If anything, I felt worse than I did before I fell asleep. While Fenris was moving with some difficulty, he was still shrugging it off like a true warrior and moving so confidently. I was just…waddling behind him like a wounded goose. I could hear the footsteps, growing closer…we weren't moving fast enough. I wasn't moving fast enough. Fenris could have bolted out of here so easily if he wasn't trying to wait on me. Why didn't this imbecile just leave me behind?!

"Fenris…! They're catching up…!"

"…This way, come on!"

He practically gripped my hand like a vice and suddenly tugged me around a corner, half-dragging me behind him as we both ducked into the closest archway to try to find a safer location. There had to be a door out of here, right?! RIGHT?! This was not the time for us to be terribly lost! Thankfully, this room had another door with a long staircase. Another floor up? There was no way that every single one of them was going to be able to follow us up here…right?

It was a delightful blessing to hear their thundering footsteps fading out of my range of hearing as I stumbled along behind Fenris. I was seriously pushing my limits again, but it was the only thing I could do to avoid being a burden to him. I almost fell to my knees a few times, but Fenris tugged me right back up every time I started wobbling. I wasn't going to complain; giving into weakness would be the death of us both.

I don't know how many rooms we went stumbling through, but just when we thought we were safe…the thundering sound echoed through the halls again. This time, I could practically feel the ground shaking below me. That…was big. Very big.

"…Fenris…!"

 _ **BOOM!**_

Rubble and dust particles went flying everywhere as the wall in our current location came crumbling down thanks to the giant mass of darkspawn flesh that just came ramming through. With the massive size of the thing and misshapen face, it was obvious that we had just been 'greeted' by a very unhappy ogre darkspawn.

Most common darkspawn simply appear to have humanoid bodies with skeleton faces, but ogres were completely different. Take a man and make him as tall as a house, give him a shortened lower jaw with massive teeth and a scrunched-up nose, then stretch his skull out to have intricate thick horns, and you've got yourself an ogre. Even fighting an army of faceless ghost-like Shades would have been better than this guy. It would have been nice if he'd just…went smashing through another wall and went about his day, but no. The darkspawn were hell-bent on destroying all life indiscriminately. As soon as he had his sights set on us, I knew a battle was inevitable.

"Stay behind me!"

"No, we need to run…!"

"We can't outrun this one!"

…Why do the gods hate me so!? WHY!?


End file.
